Monday, August 8, 2011
The Truthful State
Nate and I went away for the weekend going north into the Upper Lower Peninsula, or if you use your hand to show the map of Michigan, we were at the tip of the pinky. If you'd rather just know where we were, we were near Traverse City, the home of all cherries ever grown. Except for George Washington's cherry tree, Traverse City must own every cherry out there because they are REALLY obsessed with all things cherry. They have cherry pie, cherry jam, cherry coffee, cherry tea, cherry wine, cherry muffins, cherry and almond encrusted __________ (fill in the blank of any meat you can think of), cherry chicken salad, etc and so on. Since coming home I've struggled with what to write to all of you. I want to be witty. I want to be wise. I want to be__________ (fill in the blank with all good things). Instead, I'm in a state of flux. I feel a bit restless. I feel totally unmotivated. I am frustrated with my lack of desire to make right choices regarding food and exercise. I've been here before. I had hoped to avoid it again. But, going around in a circle seems to be the journey of life sometimes. And so here I am. Thinking through, but not calculating the number of calories I took in over the weekend and the lack of calories used... thinking through the mental talk I gave myself yesterday of "C'mon Jenna! Get yourself together!" and how after so little sleep last night all I could muster was a 4 mile/hr walk on the treadmill....that lasted 35 minutes...using up a whopping 200 calories...and all I dreamt about while grocery shopping was tacos...so that's what I cooked...even though I have chicken marinating for the grill and a very nice sweet potato ready for baking. From the sermon on Sunday I need to remember that the condition of my heart today affects my life today. Yesterday is done. Living in regret over "couldas/shouldas" does no one any good. Although we would love to have some "do overs" in life, they aren't a reality. I need to let today go and commit to living tomorrow as the gift that it is. So, I believe I will call it a day, good reader, and I look forward to a new day with new opportunities and a renewed heart and mind tomorrow....of course, as Annie so famously said, "Tomorrow is always a day away."