Thursday, December 29, 2011

Back to Life... Back to Reality

Oh yes.... I did it... do you now have that amazing En Vogue song stuck in your head?  Well, I NEED to not just get it stuck in my head but get it to be the theme song of the new year. I returned to work yesterday and when I put on the pants I was going to wear the reality check that occurred was a bit painful. Over the holidays I definitely over indulged and I don't believe I moved one muscle to work out. I basically relaxed and vegetated and remained in a lounging position most of the time. It's truly amazing how quickly your body begins to reflect your action or lack there of. I don't know why I find it amazing. It's a simple physics principle. For every action there is an equal opposite reaction. No exercise = flabby muscles. Out of control eating = weight gain. I don't know why I should be surprised when my pants feel tight when I put them on after two weeks of no exercise and overeating. So, yesterday I got a reality check from my lower body. And I need to get my act together. Because the first leg of my 2012 New Year's Resolution begins on January 7th. I have a couple New Year's Resolutions. Regardless of the fact that I tend to make grandiose resolutions and then fail to follow through, I have hope that one year,(I'm planning on it being THIS year) I will carry it to completion.

1. 2012 New Year's Resolution #1: I am planning to run a race every month of the year. I've mapped out potential races for each month through September thus far. My first race, which I have already signed up for is the Lansing for Haiti run on Saturday, January 7th. I am running a 5K. Translation:  I need to get CRACKALACKIN'!!!  My connected goal is to run a 1/2 marathon by the end of 2012. The payoff of this resolution will be that I will be in a state of perpetual training throughout the year. So that's my first resolution.

2.  2012 New Year's Resolution #2:  Working for an organization where I field complaint calls on occasion, I'm living with the reality that you never hear the good that your organization does, you just hear the negative. So, you strive to basically never hear anything because that means you're doing a good job. My plan is to start sharing the positive. My first letter will be written to Delta Airlines. On our return flight from Charlotte, our flight to Atlanta was delayed due to weather. This caused us to seriously wonder if we would even make our connecting flight. We were seated in the very last row and it took quite a while to exit the plane. And, if you're familiar with the Atlanta airport, we had to take the tram to a whole other concourse and then run to gate 47....that's right....from 1 to 47. The connecting flight was to depart at 10:25 and our flight from Charlotte didn't even land until 10:00. As I approached gate 47, I saw a Delta representative standing near the entry ushering us to the door. They had held the flight for us. I was truly amazed. Basically, we got on board, they closed the door and we took off. Due to the quick transition, our bags didn't make it. However, the Delta representative was very professional and efficient and our bags were brought to our home within two days after our flight. I'm sure there are things I could complain about regarding the service, the luggage handling, etc. but I think about how many bags they deal with on a daily basis and I didn't have to wait for the next flight. I didn't even have to return to Indianapolis (our airport of origin) to pick them up. They transferred them to Detroit and had the Detroit crew deliver them. All of that to say, I'm going to attempt to look at the positive and not just that, I want to share the positives with the companies I deal with. So, that's a long explanation, but that's resolution #2.

So my friends, what will you turn into your reality in 2012?

Monday, December 19, 2011


I have gotten in the habit of allowing Lucy to lick Blue's food bowl after she has eaten each morning. She loves to eat the leftovers. However, today, as I sit here in fact, I'm holding out. I've put brand new wet food in Lucy's bowl this morning and she isn't eating it. She's staring at Blue's bowl and whining. While Blue has left her bowl with minor remnants remaining, and is probably at Lucy's bowl eating her food as well,  Lucy sits here staring at Blue's bowl and whining. It reminds me a lot of what we do, what I do, on a daily basis. God has given me so much. A wonderful husband, a beautiful home that keeps me warm and comfortable, food for every meal, different clothes for every day of the week x3 or 4, a great job, great friends and a strong loving family. And yet, all I tend to focus on is what I don't have. What I still need in my life that would make me happy. Deep down I know full well that things do not make one happy. Money doesn't bring peace. All I need to do is look at these two furry children and see. Blue is now curled up purring with total contentment and Lucy is still reaching for Blue's bowl crying and whining when her bowl is full. I tell her she is being ridiculous and yet I wonder, how often I'm the ridiculous one.

Wednesday, December 14, 2011

No Need to Obey the Growl

I have been struggling with this 20 pounds for quite a while. I have set goals that keep getting moved and adjusted and once again, I'm sitting here looking at the same 20 pounds making itself at home on my frame and once again seeing a goal date passing by. My latest goal was Christmas. I gave myself plenty of time. It was completely doable. As time marched forward, it became more and more a miraculous event that would have to take place and now, I'm resigned to the fact that this 20 pounds and I will welcome 2012 together as well. What is it about this wall that I can't seem to get over? I know it's doable. I've done it before. Where's the willpower? The strength? The determination?

I noticed yesterday that the minute I feel a growl in the stomach (FYI for those of you losing weight, it's a good thing to feel the hunger means your body will begin to use your fat stores) I panicked and began searching for food. Why panic? Is there really any fear that I will starve to death?  I don't think so. Why do I scurry to obey the growl? Why am I not scolding it as you would a whiny person (I wanted to say child, but the last person I heard whine was myself...clearly an adult)  and say, "be quiet. You'll be fed soon enough. You aren't going to starve. You have a perfectly great meal planned for later. You have eaten enough to power you through. Deal with it."

I'm searching for motivation. I'm searching for a crack in this wall. I'm searching for a new resolve.

Sunday, December 11, 2011

FYI: When the vet says, "You're not going to like what I'm going to say." Brace yourself. It isn't good. And when that same vet tells you that your 11 month old incredibly energetic, loves to run, play fetch, and just move basically unless she is sleeping puppy needs 4-6 weeks of "crate rest" you know that you are in for an incredibly whiny and long December and January.

Evidently, when Lucy tripped in the yard last Saturday, she stretched a tendon in her knee and now her knee pops in and out of joint. So, our choices are:
1. 4-6 weeks crate rest along with 10 days of an anti-inflammatory pill.
2. Be referred to an orthopedist who would tell us the same thing
3. Surgery, which is not recommended at this point.

As Nate and I stood there listing to Dr. Maja tell us our options, I know that my eyes were growing wider and wider in shock. I don't think Nate heard anything beyond orthopedist because he interrupted that as  "Cha-ching! Cha-ching!

In other news, do you watch the show Mad Men? Nate and I have found the series on Netflix and have been watching it and trying to catch up so that we are up to speed when Season 5 begins in March. We are completely addicted and have full conversations about the show just as my Gramma used to talk about JAG. We watched 9 episodes yesterday. 9 episodes of 47 minutes each! That's over 7 hours of watching TV in one afternoon/evening. And then, we talked about it and I dreamt about it all night. And what did I wake up thinking?  I wonder how many episodes we can watch today??!! 

Saturday, December 3, 2011

When I Run

When I run I am convinced I will die in the first 5 minutes. I think thoughts like, "how long will it take for someone to find me?" and "How will they find out who I am so they can notify Nate?"  You know, all those kinds of uplifting, encouraging thoughts that always are a positive influence to keep me running. What helps is knowing that every time I run I go through these thoughts and I haven't keeled over yet! So, I keep going.

When I run I feel a sense of euphroia (after that first 5 minutes) to which nothing else I've accomplished comes close. I feel strong. I believe there are no boundaries to what I can accomplish.

Today, I ran. This was my first race in over a year. And I can honestly say that I felt like I was in the midst of spiritual warfare just getting to this race. I signed up for the race with some fear and trepidation after not even attempting to run the previous race I registered for. I felt like such a failure in the area of running. That euphoric feeling? Yeah, I didn't feel much of it at any point of any run. I really felt like this race was going to be cathartic for me. And I must say, every road block that could come my way did. I didn't train the way I wanted to....the way I should have. With that knowledge, I said, it doesn't matter. I'm going to run as long as I can and I'll walk the rest....but I WILL finish this race. Friday morning I woke up with congestion, chills, sore throat..definitely the makings of a cold. My first thought was, will I be able to run this race? I continued my mantra. I'll run as long as I can...I'll walk the rest....but I WILL finish this race. Early Saturday afternoon, Lucy went outside and somehow hurt her leg.... 3 hours before I was to run. My first thought as I watched her limp around and finally just lay down and not move for an hour was that we would have to take her to the emergency vet and I would miss the race. After the hour, Nate and I had her walk around and there was some improvement. We decided we'd go ahead and go to the race and let her rest and see how she was when we returned. I felt like every way I turned there was some other issue or problem that could have easily been used as an excuse to not run today. But, I did run the race today.

When I run a race, I run faster than I do on the treadmill or on the road alone. I don't know what it is. I honestly feel like I'm running the same pace as usual, but I run faster. I feel stronger. As I'm surrounded by other runners, I feel a sense of camaraderie and feel a part of a team working toward a common goal. I also see them as competitors that spur me on to run faster. At the gym, I usually run a 12 minute mile. Today, I ran the 5K in 32 minutes. That's a little less than an 11 minute mile. That's with a cold, and a poor training program.

I ran today. And after I was finished, I could see why Satan fought me every inch of the way. The euphoria was back. The determination had returned. The person that I want to be was back on top.

When I run, I win a battle against gluttony, against laziness and I treat my body as the temple it is. When I run, I'm reminded of Who I belong to and my purpose. For a lot of people, it's "just a run." For me, it's life.